Posts Tagged ‘Renee Montoya’
Before we get there, I know what complaints I’m gonna get. “Where’s Bruce Wayne? The Spirit? Tony Stark?” Well, not here. Batman and the Spirit are legends in their own right, big enough that I’d consider their legacy to be a power in and of itself. And Tony Stark has weird implants now. TOTALLY COUNTS. Also, he has the power to drink more than ten Winston Churchills.
10. Expert swordfighter, chess-player, and bull-dresser, Seaguy (apparently, also his real name?) wants nothing more that to actually be a superhero. Unfortunately, when you live in some Orwellian acid trip and all you have is a wetsuit and a sidekick like Chubby Da Choona (a floating, cigar-smoking tuna who is afraid of water), this is harder than it seems. Seaguy somehow deals with Xoo (“1/2 an animal on a stick!”), Egyptians on the moon, the Gondolier (aka: Death), and a bizarre parody of Walt Disney and his creations. If you couldn’t tell from that description, this is one of Grant Morrison’s fucking balls-out head trips. He’s written two of three volumes so far and, as weird as the book is, I’m eagerly awaiting the final arc. DA FUG!
9. Frank Castle watched his whole family get murdered by a mob in Central Park. In retaliation, he became the Punisher shot EVERYBODY EVER. Armed to the fucking teeth, this guy took on Bullseye, Spider-Man, and the unfuckwithable Kingpin. And what does he have to show for it? Three movies, all of which Marvel hopes you forget (and none of which where he’s played by Henry Rollins, what gives?). His Archie team up was better than all of his movies. Poor Guy.
8. I’ll let Maggie take this one, here she is: Xander is AWESOME. He is the world’s most adorable weenie, but he’s also the Nick Fury of the Buffyverse. And before I hear a word about Xander’s televised origins, he is in BUFFY SEASON EIGHT. Which is a comic. By Joss Whedon (and friends). The closest Xander ever came to really having powers was being able to remember random military shit from that one time he got turned into a Real Soldier on Halloween. He worked for Dracula. Hell, he was BFF with Count-fucking-Dracula for a minute. Xander can tame vengeance demons, rage-blind witches, and the Slayer herself. He lost his virginity to Faith (hot), and he decapitated the motherfucker who killed his most recent paramour. Do not. Fuck. With Xander.
7. Vic Sage and Renee Montoya are both totally underrated folks. Vic Sage was the Question for-fucking-ever and then Rucka took over. Vic died from lung cancer in Nanda Parbat while talking crazy at Renee Montoya. She ended up taking up the mantle from him and subsequently beat the shit out of the cult of Cain during Final Crisis and is now beating the shit out of inner city thugs while busting up a prostitution ring. Fuck yeah, the Questions. Most underappreciated heroes ever!
6. Between his Twilight of the Superheroes pitch and Rorschach, it seemed like Alan Moore had it out to create the antithesis of the Question. At the start, Rorschach is the only active vigilante left in the Watchmen universe. Keeping in mind that this was written during the Cold War (AND the Reagan administration), Rorschach is intensely right-wing and anti-Communist. Despite being as mentally (and hygienically) fucked up as possible, he manages to do what none of the others would and (SPOILER) die for what he believes.
5. Barbara Gordon and Dick Grayson get lumped together. I know, it’s cheating, but it is OK. She is Oracle, he is Robin or Nightwing or Batman or whatever. You already know all about them so whatever. And you know what? Maggie’s right. They need to freaking get it on already. Get on it, Morrison!
4. John Constantine almost seemed like an after thought. He was created by Alan Moore as a sort of guide for Swamp Thing when he was freaking out over his identity. What he ended up being was the DCU’s definitive Fox Mulder-style paranormal detective. Pick an author and it’s more than likely that John Constantine has been featured in one of their stories at some point. One of my favorite things about this character is that he ages in real time. Seriously, how much more human can you get than that?
3. Ollie has a hell of a story. Dude was a Bruce Wayne wannabe who crashes onto an island and learns to make and shoot bows and arrows. He eventually gets off the island, dons a Robin Hood-like costume, and becomes a super-liberal crime fighter. He also becomes mayor of Star City, starred in a weird political series with Green Lantern Hal Jordan (written by Dennis O’Neill), marries Black Canary (arguably one of the most sought after ladies of the DCU), and goes through absolute fucking Hell (both literally in Kevin Smith’s run and figuratively in Mike Grell’s excellent The Longbow Hunters). Here’s just an idea I’d like to throw around, though, DC. Queen in the White House in 2012. You KNOW that’d be awesome.
2. Spider Jerusalem is essentially just Hunter S. Thompson if he’d have lived til the future. As much of a “gonzo journalist” as Hunter was, Spider roams around the City “monstering” with his “filthy assistants,” trying to expose the politicians for the dicks they are. He is not one to sell his soul and certainly not one to just roll over. He is as persistent in accomplishing his goals as some of the capes are and certainly willing to die to achieve them. I’m not usually a fan of Warren Ellis’ stuff (Iron Man: Extremis excluded) but his writing on this character is amazing. I’m eventually going to write an entry about the brilliance of Transmetropolitan once I re-read it (for, like, the fifth time).
1. What? I’m putting a MARVEL character at number one? Damn straight I am… Motherfucking Nick Fury. Dude is pretty much in charge of S.H.I.E.L.D, an organization so powerful that it practically controls the Marvel Universe. Nick Fury has the greatest superpower of all, political power, and is able to pretty much get anything he wants done. Plus, the dude can keep HYDRA at bay, and in the Marvel Universe, that is pretty much the hardest thing EVER. Kudos, Mr. Fury. You win at being the bestest regular human EVER.
My friends will tell you, I can grow one hell of an Alan Moore beard. I love walking around shirtless while listening to Thin Lizzy’s “Emerald” on repeat. For every glass of water I drink, I have three glasses of beer. I have man hands and I have man feet and I have man junk. I am a man.
Now that I have that out of the way, I’d like to tell you about Renee Montoya, Helena Bertinelli, Kate Kane, Carrie Stetko, Tara Chace, Elektra Natchios, and Diana Prince. Any one of them could kick the ever loving shit out of me without even trying. Who do I have to blame for this?
His current run on Detective Comics is the best example of how formidable his female characters can be. This title’s main feature is Batwoman (who is putting up one hell of a fight against this weird-ass Alice and her Cain cult). My favorite, however, is the second feature starring the Renee Montoya version of the Question. [Astute readers will recall that Renee first appeared in Batman: The Animated Series as a Gotham cop – M]. Rucka previously worked with the Vic Sage version of the Question in Huntress/Batman: Cry for Blood and has pretty much been in charge of Montoya since Sage passed the torch to her in 52 (which Rucka wrote with Johns, Morrison, and Waid). Rucka wrote for Montoya again in Five Books of Blood and in Final Crisis: Revelations (which is my absolute favorite tie-in to that event). I think Rucka put it best with what he wrote across the cover of my copy (and Maggie’s copy, and probably a lot of people’s copies) of Detective Comics #854: “She kicks ALL the ass.”
I never much cared for Wonder Woman books before I picked up a copy of The Hiketeia at San Diego Comic-Con. Holy fuck, that book. The premise is that a girl murders some pornographers in Gotham City, runs to New York, and requests shelter from Diana with some weird plea ripped from “the Iliad.” Diana has to take her in, despite Batman wanting to bring the girl to justice. Fuck yeah, you gotta find and read that book. His run in volume two of Wonder Woman expanded on the idea of Diana Prince being completely willing to sacrifice everything (up to and including her fucking eyesight) for the greater good.
Oh man, and his Oni Press ladies. Carrie Steko from Whiteout [Now a major motion picture! -M] kicks ass after getting her fingers chopped off Margot Tenenbaum-style (if Margot’s birth family lived in Antarctica). Then, she goes back for fucking seconds. In the first issue of Queen and Country (the entirety of which is linked to in the “Gateway Drugs: Your Mom” post), Tara Chace, alone in Kosovo, snipes a dude in the dome and escapes with nothing but a UN jacket and a naked photo of herself (yes, I know, that sentence was weird to type, too).
Unfortunately, I have yet to read either Ultimate Daredevil and Elektra or Huntress/Batman: Cry for Blood. They’re both pretty much on the top of my want list and I’ve been trying to hunt down a copy, but to no avail. Hell, the only time I’ve ever actually seen a physical copy of Cry for Blood was in the hands of some guy in a Mexican restaurant after preview night at SDCC. I stood there staring at it until that awkward realization that his entire table was starring back. Hey, Mr. Rucka. If you read this, wanna tooootally hook me up with one (pwetty pwease)?
Needless to say, Greg Rucka, you are gifted at writing for women that make me feel like a namby pamby little puss-puss. I commend you on that. If I had to read one more comic where the females either seems helpless or seem to fall out of their clothes every other page (see: 90% of comics in the 1990s and a weird, disturbing little percentage in the 50s, eek), well, I’d pretty much give up on comics being anything but a fucking circle jerk. Well done, Greg Rucka. Your female characters have made my testicles retreat into my torso, but you know, in a good way. Wait. What?